Nameless Terror

2016-01-10 12:21梅皓
汉语世界(The World of Chinese) 2016年5期
关键词:小丑气球恐惧

梅皓

Sisterhood, loss, and the genesis of fear

忽然響起的电话,看似欢乐的 小丑,五颜六色的气球--寻常事物为何让人莫名恐惧?

1. TELEPHONE

Ring ring

Fang Yueru jumped up as she brought the handset near her face to speak, the sharp tone of the bell still lingering in her ears. “How do you do! This is the administrative division; how may I assist you?”

“Do you really have to go so all-out? Youre a part time assistant…” Su Xiao, Fangs course mate, scrunched up her face as she looked in the mirror. They were used to living the chill life together—staying at home worked for them. If it werent for their universitys requirement that they show some kind of internship experience to graduate, they never would have found this part-time job, ending up as assistants in a small, stuffy room.

Being an assistant was pretty simple. Go upstairs, go downstairs, pick up and deliver this or that document, answer the phone. The phone was a hassle. It had a dial and was practically an antique. Su Xiao couldnt resist touching it the first time she saw it. But as soon as she put her fingers on it, it rang, startling her. The caller was a wrong number that hung up after two rings.

Su Xiao said two very exaggerated hellos as she picked up the handset so that the middle-aged female manager next door wouldnt think they were slacking off. This time Fang had somehow backed herself up to the doorway, where she was gripping the frame, face pallid as beads of sweat dripped from her face, staining her lightly-colored t-shirt.

“Hey, whats wrong?” asked Su Xiao.

Fang stared at the phone, as she remarked in a low voice: “Why didnt you pick it up earlier?”

Thus began her relationship with the phone. Every time it rang, no matter where she was in the office, shed run over and make sure she picked it up before it rang twice. Su Xiao was confused. Seeing how Fang lost her mind every time the phone rang, the fear in her eyes, she thought she looked like a puppet on strings. If the phone only rang once before the caller hung up, Fang would sit uneasily in her place for the rest of the day. On this particular day, the two of them were descending the staircase when the office phone rang again.

Ring

The sonic waves from the phones ringer assaulted the tympanic membrane. Su Xiao never thought the ring of a phone could be so intense. She groaned as she walked on, but Fang reacted like shed just received a death threat and ran back to the office.

“Come on, were already off the clock!”

Exasperated, Su Xiao could only follow. Having to run in her high heels, Fang tripped as she scrambled up the stairs and let out a miserable scream. Su Xiao caught up to her and helped her up, “Look at you, why are you in such a hurry?”

“Dont mind me, go get the phone!” Fang yelled at Su Xiao as she clutched her knee. The extent of her panic frightened Su Xiao, who had no choice but to run even faster to the office. Just as she reached the door, the shrill ringing of the phone ceased, infuriating Su Xiao, who stamped her foot as Fang hobbled over. Afraid Fang would lose it again, Su Xiao quickly said, “Youre really overdoing it here. The office is already locked, so we couldnt have gotten to the phone no matter how fast we hurried.” Fang ignored her explanation, and fell to her knees, her expression suddenly changing as she muttered: “We missed the call, we missed the call…”

“Why are you so scared?” Su Xiao had to ask. “Tell me, maybe youll feel a bit better.”

“At first, I didnt know,” Fang trembled as she shook her head. “I was just terrified. When Id hear the ring, my hair would stand on end, I felt like something wasnt right. You dont think its frightening? So quiet, and then all of a sudden, ‘ring ring, seemingly without end! You dont know what will happen if you pick up the phone, but if you dont pick up, something unexpected might happen. I have recurring nightmares now, all about unanswered phones. A phone just rings and rings in an empty room. Its so noisy! I have to hide in the corner, but it rings louder and louder and louder, and then the entire phone explodes! I dont know whos killed but blood and flesh fly everywhere. Its terrifying! Then I dreamed of the phone, and I was going to pick it up, so that it wouldnt explode and kill anyone, but every time Im too late!” Fangs eyes were beginning to tear up. “Every time, Im just a little bit off. No matter how hard I run, I cant change the outcome! I get closer and closer each time, and I saw clearer and clearer. I slowly discovered that the phone wasnt a phone, but a human head! Covered in blood! And it explodes right before my eyes! I…”

As Fang spoke, Su Xiao began to tremble too.

Then the phone rang again.

The ringing was amplified, somehow urgent and strange.

“I have to pick up that phone!” Fang pulled open the hallway window outside the office, and, ignoring her injured knee, pulled herself inside.

“Hey!” Su Xiao yelled out, but Fang was already in the office. The phone was still ringing, as if it would never stop. Su Xiao stood on her tiptoes and looked through the window to see Fang staggering toward the desk, where she managed to pick up the phone before it stopped ringing.

“Hi there, this is the administrative division, how may I…” Fang couldnt finish her sentence.

Over the wire came a voice, a woman gently saying, “Yueru dear, pick up the phone.”

Fangs entire body froze up. “What? What are you talking about?”

“Yueru dear, I said pick up the phone.” It sounded as if the woman was laughing softly. “Come on, Yueru, pick that phone up. Pick up the phone!”

This voice was familiar; it was… Fangs entire body began to tremble, as she raised her eyes to see the hallway outside slowly darkening, but she could see Su Xiaos head poking up over the ledge of the window. If Su Xiao was out there looking worriedly at her, then who was the voice on the phone—who was that Su Xiao?

The Su Xiao outside in the hallway looked as if shed just discovered something strange and waved hurriedly at Fang.

“Why dont you pick up the phone?” The voice in the phone said sharply. “Fang Yueru, why dont you pick up the phone?”

2. CLOWN

Su Na didnt like her mysterious new sister. One rainy night, she had a high fever, and spent a short stay in the hospital. She didnt think that when she came back shed be stuck with a little sister two years younger than herself that came out of nowhere. Her parents said she was the child of distant relatives, and as theyd fallen quite ill, she had to come live with them. Although Su Na was only ten years old, she didnt quite buy their explanation. “Take your sister out to play,” her mother pushed, making it seem like she was in a hurry for them to develop a sisterly bond. The adults didnt understand that there are problems in a childs world, too.

Su Na had taken her little sister out to join in the games with the children in the yard and was introducing her to the others one by one. “This is my little sister, this is my little sister.” The little girl was very quiet, as if she could sense that she had been abandoned and didnt want to inconvenience her new hosts.

Slowly, Su Na and her little sister came to get on nicely. She found it odd, however, that her little sister didnt mention missing her parents. No matter how she asked, her sister wouldnt speak about her family.

Childrens Day came around, and the kids in the yard were all talking about where to go, especially Professor Fangs daughter, who lives in the building opposite. She was said to have heart problems from a very young age and was always bragging about how well her parents treated her and what gifts they bought her, making the others jealous.

Su Na didnt like being around this younger child, finding her arrogant, so she didnt even bother remembering her name. Su Nas family was poor, with her parents working odd jobs, unable to give her or her little sister any surprises. Because of that, when her little sister was listening to the Fang family daughter talk about her plans for the holiday, Su Na pulled her away, back toward home. The little girl began to cry, which made Su Na feel bad.

“Where would you like to go for the holiday? Maybe I can take you,” Su Na said.

“I want to see clowns,” said the little girl, a pitiful look on her face. “I love clowns.”

Su Nas chest tightened. She knew there was a promotion at a mall near their home where clowns would perform magic every night. The event was definitely free to watch. She didnt know why, but when she heard the word “clown” she felt a tinge of panic each time.

“Sister, lets go see the clowns,” said the little girl as she shook Su Nas arm. “Just for a little bit.”

Seeing the clowns sounded fine, Su Na agreed. Her heart was beating fiercely and her legs felt a bit weak, but she couldnt think why. She picked up her little sister and headed toward the mall.

Soon, they arrived at the performance venue. “Sister, lets push our way in to see,” the little girl called out happily, dragging Su Na into the crowd. It was dusk, and the crowd was filled with children and adults that had just got off work. Su Na told herself to keep calm.

Suddenly, her little sister let go of her hand. She panicked as she stood on her tiptoes to look over the crowd but could only see the silhouettes of backs.

Su Na cried out. A number of people turned around to look at her, but she wasnt paying attention as she forced people out of her way and pushed forward. The audience members complained as she pushed all the way to the front. The brightly-colored stage came into view.

Two clowns danced a silly dance on stage, and a clown below the stage came toward her. Su Na trembled as she looked at him, terrified. His face was painted powder white, and he had a large, blood red mouth. His eyes looked as if theyd been gouged out, like two hideous scars. More off-putting was that he was incredibly thin and wore large, striped rompers. He staggered toward her, as if an invisible crowd was trying its best to hold him back. When he flopped down next to Su Na, he put on a large, red ball of a nose, and appeared to spasm. Su Na screamed as she struggled to climb away and hid in the crowd of people.

She was so terrified that she could not open her eyes. When she looked at the clown, she felt an oppressive sense of dread. She breathed through her mouth as pea-sized beads of sweat dripped down her skin, when suddenly she heard cheers from the crowd: “Look at that little girl!”

Su Na hurriedly pushed her way back to the stage. Between the two dancing clowns, there was another little figure. She was wearing her sisters dress, and her sisters sandals, and her sisters pageboy haircut, but her face...

Su Na trembled all over.

The little girls face was painted with white powder and she had a smile that extended from ear to ear, red as fresh blood. Her eyes were scarlet red, two little points of intense crimson, emitting an eerie kind of light. She moved her arms like a wooden puppet, making odd, exaggerated movements. Rounds of applause and cheers erupted from the audience.

“Sister!” Su Na called out as she shivered. She pushed through the fear in her heart to force her way up to the stage. “Sister, get down!”

Her sister on the stage didnt seem to recognize her; then, as if shed realized something, she cracked a smile.

“Somebody help me!” Su Na called out to the crowd, her eyes already filling with tears. The audience just stood there. Their laughter was sharp and frightening, unconcerned accomplices to the clowns. Su Nas chest rose and sank as she lost hope. She was going to have to save her sister herself.

She gritted her teeth as she rushed to the center of the stage and grabbed her sisters arm to pull her off the stage, only to have the three clowns grab her sisters other arm. Then, the tempo of the music changed. An odd, silly song pumped out from the speakers as Su Na fought the clowns in a tug of war, like some kind of slapstick comedy. The audience roared with laughter, believing it to be part of the show.

Suddenly, the lights on the stage went out. The performance was over, and people began to file out. But the clowns held on. Su Na glared at their faces and her sisters face, the red paint starting to melt, flowing in rivulets like fresh blood.

The bloody-faced clowns smiled horrifying smiles, and Su Nas heart felt like it was going to give out. This scene was so familiar, as if it were deeply buried in her memories. Suddenly, she thought of that rainy night, as she lay with a high fever in the back of a busted old minivan. She trembled alone in the back seat. Amidst the haze, her mother said something about getting her to the hospital quickly, that her condition was serious. “No,” said her father. “This is our best chance. Lets get this done and then go to the hospital, theres time.”

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