2020年1月浙江省高考英语读后续写试题分析

2020-08-04 04:14钱望阳
青年生活 2020年14期
关键词:词数狗狗记叙文

钱望阳

2020 年1月读后续写题型再次出现在浙江省高考英语科目写作第二节,该题型提供一段350词以内的语言材料,要求考生根据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词语进行续写(150词左右),将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。读后续写既考查学生对所学语言知识的运用能力,又考查学生的发散思维能力和创造力。该题型要求考生首先要读懂已有信息,不仅能读懂字面含义,还要理清文章的脉络和关系。续写短文时,考生需要明白故事的发展进程、前因后果、地理位置变化、人物特征和情感等。在此基础上,考生顺着文章的思路,根据线索,发挥想象,对其后的情节进行合理预测,并用英语表达出来。同时,在组织语言时,切记至少使用5个给出的提示词。下面是对本次高考读后续写试题的分析:

一、所给材料和题目要求

阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。

“Im going to miss you so much, Poppy,” said the tall, thin teenager. He bent down to hug his old friend goodbye. He stood up, hugged his parents, and smiled, trying not to let his emotions(情绪)get the better of him.

His parents were not quite able to keep theirs under control. They had driven their son several hours out of town to the university where he would soon be living and studying. It was time to say goodbye for now at least. The family hugged and smiled through misty eyes and then laughed.

The boy lifted the last bag onto his shoulder, and flashed a bright smile. “I guess this is it,” he said. “Ill see you back home in a month, okay?” His parents nodded, and they watched as he walked out of sight into the crowds of hundreds of students and parents. The boys mother turned to the dog, “Okay, Poppy, time to go back home.”

The house seemed quiet as a tomb without the boy living there. All that week, Poppy didnt seem interested in her dinner, her favorite toy, or even in her daily walk. Her owners were sad too, but they knew their son would be back to visit. Poppy didnt.

They offered the dog some of her favorite peanut butter treats. They even let her sit on the sofa, but the old girl just wasnt her usual cheerful self. Her owners started to get worried. “What should we do to cheer Poppy up?” asked Dad. “Weve tried everything.”

“I have an idea, but it might be a little crazy,” smiled Mom. “Without anybody left in the house but us, this place could use a bit of fun. Lets get a little dog for Poppy.”

It didnt take long before they walked through the front door carrying a big box. Poppy welcomed them home as usual, but when she saw the box, she stopped. She put her nose on it. Her tail began wagging(擺动)ever so slowly, then faster as she caught the smell.

注意:

1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右;

2.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语;

3.续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好;

4.续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。

Para 1 Dad opened the box and a sweet little dog appeared.

Para 2 A few weeks later the boy arrived home from university.

二、试题分析

1.故事梗概

本次试题中的短文是仍然是记叙文,全文共346词, 主要讲述了父母和Poppy送少年上大学后,Poppy不知主人还会回来而郁郁寡欢。父母尝试各种方法无果后,为Poppy领养了一只小狗以帮助Poppy走出情绪困境。该故事以“人与动物”为主题,以宠物狗Poppy的情感为主线,贴近生活,情节明晰。语言通俗易懂,以生活用语为主,划线词能灵活地穿插到各段落,适合学生续写。原文语言地道,清晰,续写创作必须要有坚实的语言基础才能与原文风格保持一致,同时考生需要展现适当的同感心和丰富的想象力才能写出出彩的文章。

2. 故事线索与逻辑

所给短文共有7段。故事背景包括:

When:after the boy went to university

Where: at home Who: Poppy; Puppy; the boy and his parents

What: Poppy was unhappy, so the boys parents got a puppy to cheer her up.

Why: Because the boy was away from home

因此从小说要素入手,在角色连续、地点连线、时间连续的基础上,故事的第1至3段描述的是故事的背景:告别的场面(departure),为下文故事的展开埋下伏笔。第4,5两段逐渐展开故事的主干:分离后,Poppy 情绪低落。最后两段描写父母想出了一个大胆的想法来为Poppy疗伤。

根据故事不同发展阶段,宠物狗Poppy有如下的情感变化:reluctant, depressed, calm.

总的来说所给原文的故事情节就是为了突出poppy对其主人的爱与依赖,以及the boy 和他的父母之间的爱意。因此在续写故事,构思情节时要顾及到这一点, 所以这样的故事结尾应该是一个有爱的幸福的结局。

3.关键词语

本次读后续写试题所给短文标出的10个关键词语中有6个名词,2个动词,2个形容词,具体可分为以下类别:

人物: Poppy, parents, boy, dog

环境: university; box

动作行为: watch; hug

状态:back

情感:cheerful

三、答题建议

1. 文体结构

全文以记叙文体为主。试题说明中明确指出“续写部分分为两段”,因此考生应紧接每段的开头语答题。词数要求在150词左右(词数没有上限,但是不能少于130词),建议两段的词数最好基本保持平衡。

2. 情节内容:Possible development

根据原文的文本大意,可以推断出新狗狗到达后的两种结果:

1)在新狗狗的陪伴下Poppy 恢复了往日的快乐;

2)Poppy因为男孩的离开依然很孤独,不能与狗狗相处。

从以上对文本的解读分析结合两个段首句可以推测续写的主要情节:

Para1: 主要写狗狗的到来给家里帶来的变化,尤其是Poppy所产生的变化。本段可以增加的细节描写包括:对新狗狗适当的外貌,动作描写;Poppy的反应;父母的反应及家庭氛围的变化。

3. 语言表达

1)时态

所给短文叙述的是发生在过去的事情,采用过去时态,因此,考生在续写故事时应沿用过去时态。

2)语法结构

语法结构的丰富性和准确性是续写评分时的一个重要标准,所以考生应避免句型单一化,尽量使用不同的语法结构。

3)细节描写

如果说情节是故事的骨架,那么细节就是故事的血肉。精彩生动的故事情节需要在细节描写中展现,使人受到感染并留下深刻印象,这就要求考生要善于在叙事中进行适当的描写。例如,在第一段可以通过对Poppy的动作和神态描写,表达她见到Puppy的开心,(cant take her eyes off the little pretty dog; dance with beam, wag; bark)第二段可以描写男孩的兴奋与感动。(a wild joy took hold of him; amazement gleamed in his eyes; try to fight back his tears)

4)语句衔接

这是记叙文体的文章,情节的发展通常按照时间顺序展开,所以考生在续写故事时应该有效地使用表示时间的短语或从句,使语句更加连贯、结构更加紧凑。例如: the instant he entered the house; then; no sooner…than等, 不太建议使用first, second, last这样机械的关联词。

总而言之,考生应该以“点、线、面”的方式从小说要素出发,以角色情感为主线,架构故事情节,丰富故事语言。

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